To Hong Kong!

After nine days in the wilderness, rafting the River of Gold, I spent three days in Thamel, the tourist centre of Kathmandu. The first night back, the rafting group took a few of our guides out for dinner and drinks. The rest of my time in Thamel was occupied with travel admin, catching up on emails and Skyping home – looking even more beardy and bedraggled than on previous calls.

Thamel is so ghastly that I don’t even want to write about it. The fact that this is all a lot of tourists see of Kathmandu and sometimes of Nepal (and that this is what Nepalis think tourists want), is even more depressing. I was glad to leave.

And what a chasm I was about to cross. Here was ending a chapter of my quest: one in which I had experienced nature’s beauty and wrath; had scaled Himalayas and collided with their cold waters; had seen religions and ways of life so different from my own; and had experienced poverty and generosity, and heard about corruption, all so far removed from home.

All of this I left behind as the Sun was setting and the rich peach light cast long shadows across the garish colours of Kathmandu’s ghettos and suburbs. My Kingfisher flight to Delhi (and then Hong Kong) took off pointing south-west, but quickly turned almost north-west and my window seat on the right of the plane was given a final farewell: the entire Himalayan range, illuminated by almost horizontal pink-orange sunlight, as we lifted above the low clouds that embraced the hills and fields around the Kathmandu valley. Such dramatic lines, so fundamental, continued to pass by my 600mph window for nearly half an hour. I said aloud,

This is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

It was incredibly difficult to take a photo through the tiny, pressure-proof but apparently not grease-proof or scratch-resistant, aeroplane window; and there was no way I was going to be able to get a picture that could transmit the majesty of the experience; but here are some photos of the Himalayas, taken from three-quarters the height of Everest.

Leaving Kathmandu

Leaving Kathmandu

Himalayas from the Air

Himalayas from the Air

More Mountains

More Mountains

This was the first time I’d taken a flight that did not involve the UK as either the initial or final destination. From one foreign land to another. Away from poor, corrupt, stuck-in-the-1970s-brown Nepal and towards mega-rich, luxury, recently-given-back-to-China Hong Kong. I’d read that Westeners say how Chinese Hong Kong is and Chinese say how Western it is. It seemed an ideal place to visit for a Londoner with a mild case of sinophilia.

Originally, my stop in Hong Kong was simply to avoid the enormous cost of flying direct from Kathmandu to Australia. I knew I wouldn’t have much money left by the time I got there and I was off to earn my first Australian cash and pay Australian taxes as an Australian citizen – exciting! As it happened, a not-too-distant cousin on the Dutch/German side of the family has been living in East Asia for eleven years (four in Tokyo, the rest in Hong Kong) and was astonishingly generous to let me stay at his apartment while he was away on business. I’d never met Godard (pronounced GO-D’T, not GOD-ARD), but my father had stayed with him and his family in Germany when they were both in their late teens. That was pretty much the last major contact we’d had with Godard until we knew I was coming to Hong Kong. As seems to happen often with family, however, in the twenty minutes I was able to meet him as we crossed paths in Hong Kong International Airport, we instantly got on and felt so familiar and comfortable in each other’s company. I am so glad to have rekindled that contact.

With accommodation kindly provided by my cousin, I’d extended my stay to a week, which meant now Godard would be coming back before I left and we could spend more than twenty minutes at the airport getting to know each other. While I was looking forward to that, I was also looking forward to getting some sleep, so I made my way straight to Godard’s apartment.

To Hong Kong!

To Hong Kong!

In Nepal, one of my favourite rooms was a plywood box at nearly 3,000m. I was genuinely happy in that room. But here was a new experience: the Four Seasons. Next to the Four Seasons Hotel is an identical tower called Four Seasons Place, which houses their serviced apartments. Where I was to be staying, alone and for free, for the next week. As I walked from the incredibly clean and efficient airport shuttle service, through the incredibly clean and mega-expensive IFC shopping mall, towards the incredibly clean, green and brass Four Seasons Place lobby, I stood out like a donkey in a zebra herd; with a crumpled M&S white shirt, red-clay-and-oil-stained trekking trousers, a beard, long hair in a colourful hair-band and a blue-duct-tape-covered rucksack still depositing sand inconvenient places. Bentinck had arrived.

Mercifully not intimidated by being under-dressed, Bentinck collects his room key and takes the black marble and brushed steel lift to the fifteenth of sixty floors (noting, on his way, the rooftop pool and gym). Gliding through the over decorated corridor, he spots his room/apartment and deftly wiff-waffs the keycard and plunges himself and his bags in to a suite. A suite in the Four Seasons (with a kitchenette). A suite in the Four Seasons with floor to ceiling windows in both the sitting room and the bedroom. With a bath AND a shower in the bathroom that’s bigger than the kitchenette. That has a bloody dining table, coffee table and desk. Oh and a flatscreen TV in the sitting room and the bedroom and the bathroom. Perhaps “astonishingly generous” was an understatement.

Without a functioning phone and with a distinct lack of practice at luxury hotels, I wandered off in search of an internet café to let my parents know I was safe. (And to brag about my accommodation.) Finding a Starbucks about 20 feet from the hotel in the IFC mall, I secured my free 20 mins of Wifi by buying an over-priced coffee. Managing to flirt so outrageously with my cute red-bobbed server-girl that I almost had an out of body experience. I was really tired. She asked my name to put on the cup so it wouldn’t get mixed up with the other fifty thousand cups of coffee they were making. This had never happened to me, so I asked if she wanted my number as well. If I was in a film it would have been super-smooth. I was in a Starbucks.

Emails sent, I went back to the hotel to sleep for a bit before assaulting the streets of Hong Kong with my I’m-not-a-tourist face. TRAVEL TIP: If your only way of accessing the internet is your Kindle and the only light entertainment you have is your Kindle, then you shouldn’t sleep with your Kindle under your arse. Especially when you’re not in the UK, so they can’t replace the Kindle you broke by sleeping with it. I had somehow managed to sort of wake up and use my Kindle for something and then dropped it on the bed in my no-sleep-for-32-hours slumber, before rolling over on top of it and cuddling up with the duvet; enjoying dreams of delightful Kindle-use in a meadow, no doubt.

That bed was a vicious temptress. You entered the room to find a glowing white quadrilateral of heavenly softness, bordered by angelic nymphs, beckoning you to lie with them. As you rest your weary body among their glorious coos and alabaster heartsong, you dissipate your soul and it mixes with the bedclothes until you feel as if sleeping in Aphrodite’s bosom. Then you wake up and find you’ve broken your fucking bastard Kindle.

So I had something to do that afternoon. Adopting my favourite way of discovering a place, Wander Around Aimlessly (WAA), I quickly found an electronics shop and asked politely if they fixed Kindles… Still dizzy from the shock of the Hong Kong attitude to service, I left the electronics shop with a map of Hong Kong, detailed directions of how to get to where they fix Kindles and the number of all the buses I could take, which stop to get off at for the metro and apologies for not being able to take me there himself.

Continuing to adopt my favourite way of discovering places, it took me a while to get to the place where they fix Kindles and I was quite tired by the time I got there. Trekking in walking boots through jungle and mud is easy compared to walking on concrete or other hard surfaces for me. I get a very tired, achey lower back after an hour or so due to my rubbish feet. So when I found that the place that fixes Kindles was now a place full of rubble, dust, broken strip lights and builders doing nothing, I was a little irked. So I had a McDonald’s.

If you have ever thought Wouldn’t it be awesome if McDonald’s delivered? OR Man, I’m really stoned OR Man, I’m so fat I can’t go outside, then you should go to Hong Kong – where McDonald’s is 24 hour, delivers and is really really cheap. Large Big Mac Meal = £1.80 (this, apparently, is much more expensive than it used to be before it was 24 hour). If, however, you have ever thought I like drinking alcohol then be wary of going to Hong Kong – where alcohol is more expensive than in London.

Returning to the Four Seasons

Returning to the Four Seasons

After my wander round Hong Kong island (I’ll get to the geography of the place in another post, so you can feel equally as lost as I did at the time), I somehow managed to find my way back to the hotel to have a shower and get ready for going out. I’d actually had a really lovely day, despite breaking my Kindle. I was amazed to find that it simply hadn’t broken my incredibly good mood at all. I thought I really love Hong Kong, why is that? and I couldn’t answer myself. I was determined to find out.

I’d walked along main roads with skyscrapers before, I’d seen signs with Chinese characters on them before – perhaps I liked Hong Kong because it reminded me of Chinatown in London, where I’d worked and partied for years? I’d seen skyways and incredibly futuristic-looking transport systems in sci-fi films and in my mind’s eye while reading sci-fi – perhaps it was the Blade Runner feeling that caught my heartstrings? I’ve lived in a big city all my life and I’ve always liked Chinese culture and language – perhaps the British occupation has made this city undeniably, but subtly familiar? I couldn’t work it out there and then. Anyway, I had a date.

Being an International Man of Mystery, I’d organised, whilst in the Himalayas, to meet with a Shanghainese girl, in Hong Kong. Being now a Luxury Backpacker, we met at the Grand Hyatt hotel, in the restaurant above the entrance. The entrance is so big that there is space to put an entire restaurant above it. The lobby is as big as a train station. But, being an International Man of Mystery, I sat in the restaurant, waiting for my slender, pretty young Chinese date to arrive, sipping on a glass of tap water because the booze was so expensive. Then she arrived and made her excuses to leave again; she worked at the hotel and things were going on a bit longer than expected. Dream shattered. International Man of Mystery credentials shot. I waited for hours, reading the (very interesting) Hong Kong newspapers, eating the absolutely most delicious buffet ever and slugging back relatively cheap wine, all at her expense, thanks to her staff account/discount.

I’m still not sure whether I actually did well out of this exchange. It felt great for the first hour or so, then I thought Bugger this, I’m off, then realised that, of course, I had absolutely nothing better to do and so sat and read more of the paper. I went for a cigarette, leaving a note saying that I’d gone for a cigarette. I came back to find a note, helpfully telling me that I’d gone for a cigarette. I read some more of the paper and drank some more wine. I would have eaten some of the really expensive chocolates I’d bought her (two of each) if she hadn’t taken them away and put them in her office, never to be seen again.

She was jolly pretty though.

Once she finally finished work, she told me to meet at the staff entrance in five minutes. I took this opportunity to have another cigarette. Outside, a very pretty young Chinese girl came up and asked my name. Then asked where I was from. I obliged and found, after a few attempts, that her name was Cherry. Right. I asked her Chinese name and was startled by how startled she was that I knew what a Chinese name was, or how to pronounce one. I was even more startled when she asked if I wanted to take her number immediately after asking which hotel I was staying in. Either “Oh, the Four Seasons” has incredible pulling power, or she was working that night. Thanks to discussions with Godard later in the week, I’m now beginning to think that my automatic assumption that it was the latter might have been wrong and that it was a third option – I might have had an interesting time, albeit one where I was guarding my passport(s), with Cherry. Either way, I made my lightning quick excuses and legged it.

I had a midnight tour of Hong Kong island from a nervous and closed-off girl, who had been so open and forthcoming in Nepal. Tired and clearly not getting anywhere, I went to bed. This time without any company, not even my Kindle.


Rafting the River of Gold

Reputedly one of the world’s top ten rivers, the Sun Kosi – the River of Gold – flows 272 km through the untouched countryside and small villages of the beautiful Mahabharat Lekh Mountains of the central Nepali Himalayas. The start-point lies three hours east of Kathmandu at Dolalghat and the end-point is at Chatra, near Dharan in the Eastern Terai.

The Sun Kosi’s volume increases considerably as it combines with seven big tributaries to become one of the major rivers of South Asia. The first few days offer fun class II-III rapids and allow time to learn the skills and team work needed for the much larger, far more challenging rapids to come. From the third day onwards, the whitewater builds into great, thundering class III-IV rapids. The Sun Kosi presents the chance to see a very special part of Nepal that is rarely seen by outsiders and, with it, billions of gallons worth of heart-pumping, world-class whitewater action.

Holiday Nepal | Definitions of Rapid Classes | Map

We slowly gathered at 7am, ready for our intrepid adventure down the Sun Kosi. Not knowing if we’d have the opportunity to change, we’d all worn various stages of it’s-OK-if-this-gets-wet undress. I’d opted for a t-shirt and swimming shorts, with the emphasis on ‘short’; a style apparently adhered to by my European compatriots – Andrea the Swiss and Charles the Frenchman. The Canadian – Logan – and the Aussie and Kiwi couples – Brent & Tara and Steve & Holly – had, unsurprisingly, better wardrobes for adventure water sports.

After a decent amount of Nepali-time had passed from our hard deadline of 7am, we walked our kit a few minutes out of the narrow streets of Thamel to a nearby main road, where our bus was waiting, with all manner of serious-looking stuff strapped professionally to the roof. We piled on board and set off on a three hour trip to our put-in point.

I dropped in and out of the swapping-stories conversation during the journey, which Logan dominated as the most travelled of us all. His restless and youthful energy to travel and see the world has taken him to every continent except Antarctica. I had begun to understand his wanderlust, even after only a short time travelling myself, but felt that the ‘sell everything and just go’ attitude was a little beyond my reach.

Leaving Kathmandu on the road to Tibet, we quickly were up in to the foothills of the Himalayas and trundling along the now familiar precarious mountain roads. We were twice stopped and checked by Gurkhas, whose blue and black camouflage in a green and brown country serves quite the opposite purpose. Our guides told us that we were being searched for cedar-wood, which is illegal to export to China. I think ‘cedar-wood smuggler’ has to be one of the worst criminal titles – not something to show off about at parties.

We arrived at the put-in around midday, thanks to our Nepali-time departure, and watched the two rafts being inflated and set up. Then suddenly lunch appeared (cold pasta, coleslaw and tuna mayo), which we ate off steel plates with steel cutlery and drank juice out of steel mugs. We were already living rough. Three of the five boys already had full grizzly-bear beards. (To save confusion, we hadn’t just grown beards thanks to the utter manliness of eating off steel; we’d actually brought them ready-made, Blue Peter style.)

Put-in Point

Put-in Point

Our safety briefing consisted of one lesson – if you fall out of the raft, get back in the raft – broken into three sub-lessons: (i) if you’re next to the raft, then hold on to it and wait for someone to pull you back in; (ii) if you’re not next to the raft, then grab the oar that someone will extend to you, perhaps by hooking the oar you cleverly remembered not to let go of onto their oar, and then do step (i); (iii) if you’re really far from the raft, then catch the rope that someone will hopefully throw to you and then do step (i).

After this, we were taught how to be rescued by one of the safety kayaks, which essentially involves having sex with the kayak.

Our final lesson was the White Water Position, which is on your back, feet pointing downstream and oar held across your chest. Oh, and that if you get caught in a ‘hole’ (a big dip where the water churns back on itself like a washing machine), then roll into a ball and you’ll probably be spat out of it; otherwise you’ll just be rolled over and over and die.


And then we set off. With a very fast current and Suren, our guide, paddling from the stern, pretty much the only paddling we did for the first two days was practising following Suren’s Germanically straightforward commands about how to paddle. Which we were utterly incapable of following. “FORWARD TEAM!” was about the only one we could manage; but with the synchronisation of an experimental jazz band and the finesse of a drunken spider with a missing leg.

Suren, Our Guide

Suren, Our Guide

I’d chosen this river over the more aggressive Karnali because it begins easy and gets harder. Perhaps this was a wise decision; or perhaps the Karnali’s baptism of fire (or baptism of crashing torrents of death-water) would have smartened us all up into efficient rapid-conquering paddlers. I will only find out by returning to Nepal and running the Karnali. Which I fully intend to do. You should come too.

Aside: As I write this in the light of the setting sun, beside the Derwent river in Tasmania, the half-Moon hangs almost directly above me in a darkening blue sky. To my left, a bright pinpoint of light sits just above the horizon where the Sun just was. To my right, at almost the same height, sits another. They are the only lights in the sky. I believe this is the first time I’ve ever seen Mars, because one of them must be Venus.

If you have any idea how to check this, please let me know. I was at 42.781240 South, 147.054427 East at 20:30 EST on 04/11/2011.

So, the first couple of days were a bit of a non-event in terms of white water (or ‘swift-water’, opposed to ‘flat-water’). We weren’t always floating along on fast-moving calm water (Class I); sometimes the water would get a bit choppy, like a slightly windy day in a harbour, with regular waves sometimes a foot or two high (Class II) – the kind of thing hips trained by dancing, gymnastics, martial arts or riding would see you through with an upright torso as the raft pitches and rolls.

Rafting the Sun Kosi

Rafting the Sun Kosi

We’d do between three and five hours of rafting each day, stopping for lunch (cold pasta, coleslaw and tuna mayo) on one of the many fine white sandy beaches that gazillions of gallons of gushing mountain water, over hundreds of millions of years, have washed, rolled, bashed, eroded, ground and deposited for our blissful enjoyment.

There is something peculiar about sitting on a beach, sunning oneself after a delicious lunch, with waves lapping against the shore and then realising that you’re in a land-locked country and this is a river. That the waves are not rhythmic, but erratic, caused by an ongoing war between gravity and big rocks, where water draining from the tallest mountains in the world is beaten and bashed on its way to the Ganges.

It is particularly peculiar when the Sun’s gone down, but the Moon is not yet up, it’s only 6pm and you’re sat waiting for supper made on a gas stove that’s been carried over rapids on an inflatable raft manned by a lone rower with ten-foot oars. When you can see the Milky Way because the only other light comes from the seven single light bulbs you can see dotted around the valley; in houses to which there are no roads.

We’d pitched tents, supplied by the company, and after a delicious supper (these guys could cook!) we talked and drank some of the booze we’d brought (not included in the price). Then the Moon rose over the hill on the other side of the river and suddenly the beach lit up. We no longer needed our head-torches, as the Moon had been full only the night before and the clear sky afforded us a complete celestial illumination from the Earth-child’s reflected Sun-rays. I’m being a bit over the top for a reason: it was powerfully chest-filling; that way that a thought can be so big and natural and beyond oneself that it overwhelms and induces an almost-dizziness. The combination of the imagined scale of the solar system, the aeons and ages that humans have experienced moonlight and the vastness of the small fraction of the globe we were traversing, all mixed with the unusual experience of a naturally illuminated night, was cause for a gasp.

Every night except the first and last we made a fire out of driftwood. This quickly became a competition to see who could carry or drag the biggest tree back to camp. Which Logan won, being more like a bear than any person I’ve ever met. And not like a teddy bear either; like an actual Canadian bear. One evening we ended up with enough wood for three fires; which instead became one fire and several benches.

Camp Fire

Camp Fire

After three days of relatively easy going, we embarked on what was promised to be a more active day’s rafting. It wasn’t really, especially as the one rapid we had to ‘scout’ (stop to check if it’s runnable) was so horrifically violent that we instead sat back and watched as the guides pulled the rafts through with long ropes. One of the kayakers did run it, however, and as he hit the first wave, flew several feet into the air, before landing in another wave and then somehow managing to just avoid the gigantic hole that promised to swallow him up, then tiptoeing his way through the remaining raging vortices of angry foam. His absolutely expressionless face remaining absolutely expressionless. While the previous few days of sedentariness had me overly keen to run this rapid, in retrospect I’m glad we didn’t. We were really really dreadful at following Suren’s orders and we would have been lucky to come out of it with even one person in a probably upside-down raft. That was the only Class IV+/V rapid we saw during the whole trip; I’m also glad we didn’t run it because the extra on-the-spot insurance I’d bought had only extended my cover to Class IV. They don’t insure Class V.

The previous day’s lunchtime (cold pasta, coleslaw and tuna mayo) had seen a fantastic addition to the trip. Brent mentioned how great it would have been if we’d brought a Frisbee. I looked down at the steel plate in my hand and made a suggestion. The steel plate flew gracefully; and so was born Platesbee – which we played almost every day; always, somehow, managing to recover the plate when it inevitably found its way in to the river and quickly sank.

That day, we had also discovered what it’s like to have to get back in the raft. Not because we’d flipped or run a dangerous rapid, but because we’d all decided to go for a swim during a particularly calm stretch; which had a small rapid at the end of it that would have dispersed us almost irretrievably. I was about fifteen metres downstream of the raft and swimming as hard as I could until I couldn’t any more got me about a fifteenth of the way. I at once appreciated the power of the river and what, if I was so unfortunate, it would do to me given the chance. The dragon Sun Kosi was lying in wait.

Valley View

Valley View

The fifth day was a rest day; and we were glad of it. I think we’d all had the thought that questioned why we’d signed up to any more than four days of what had risked, at times, being monotonous. The rest of the group went for a short trek (which included a booze run in the middle of nowhere), while I opted to stay and write my journal. This also meant I had the chance to practice in the kayak while no one was looking. In trying to explain to the Nepali kayaker what experience I’d had, I’d felt I’d talked myself up a bit. Journal writing was brief, as Pradeep, the kayaker, asked about my tattoo.

I have several different answers about my tattoo, depending on the level of interest I gauge after saying ‘it means infinity’. Pradeep seemed pretty interested and I ended up giving a maths lesson with a stick in the sand. Because the symbols are global and Pradeep knew a lot more maths than most, I was able to communicate much better about countable infinity, cardinal and ordinal numbers, and transfinite numbers than I was with most things in English. Although when we got to uncountable infinities, neither my knowledge of the maths nor my miming skills were up to the task of explaining the density of the continuum. So we went kayaking.

Having not done any advanced kayaking for at least ten years, if not fifteen or more, I was not expecting to pick up the Eskimo Roll immediately, but had hoped it would come back to me. The minute I dipped into the water, however, I had no confidence in my lungs and I panicked. Eventually I couldn’t continue, as my panic would no longer subside between attempts. While Pradeep was complimentary about almost every aspect of my roll, we both agreed that my panic and shortness of breath were the Achilles Heel to any further progress. Disappointed, I vowed to improve and spent a little time later in the day holding myself under the water, training my breath and discovering my limits. Once everyone had returned from the trek, I had another go in amongst others having their first go. I was much more calm and confident, and I improved; but still couldn’t roll. In my determination to do so, I ended up hogging the kayak and Pradeep as the Sun was setting. Sorry guys.

Kayak Training

Kayak Training

Aside: My list of Things to Do When I Get Home now includes a flat-water kayak instructor course and a white/swift-water kayak course. This is part of the rekindling of my plan to take some friends and some kayaks to the lakes and rivers of Canada; which will involve kayaking from Birmingham to London on the canal as part of the training. For this trip I will need kayaks and, of course, interested friends. It will take some time to plan, so if you’re interested (you don’t yet have to be a friend) please register your interest here and we’ll start planning in the new year. If you have expertise (or even basic knowledge) in any of the following, please let me know, so that I may pick your brains: kayaks, Canadian rivers and lakes, Canadian wilderness, survival and sports nutrition.

As we were enjoying our kayak lessons, our supper was approaching. From the other side of the river. On four legs; and extremely upset. As the little pig was led, dragged and carried by the rope tied to its hind leg, it squealed a cry of fear that one’s bones could understand; and feel. The valley amplified and augmented the sound till it ran through your ears, heart and soul. I can’t imagine what it would have been like for Tara, the only vegetarian, whose distress was silently as loud as the pig.

Ferried across the river in the hollowed-out tree trunk the locals use for transport, our supper settled down once it was tethered and left for a while. I was invited to watch the killing and, having missed the spectacle of sacrifice during Dasain due to a confusion of days, thought it was a thing I should probably witness. Suren explained that the process would not be quick or painless, as they didn’t have the right equipment, but that the technique they would use was the best they could do. Taking a sharpened sliver of bamboo, about six inches long, our chef for this evening (a local friend of Suren) would jab precisely in to the beast’s heart – something only an expert could do without piercing a lung. With the first swift and delicate jab, the bamboo snapped and missed the heart; the subsequent twenty-or-so violent and blind thrusts and attempt to recover a dreadfully botched job. The pig died very slowly and in great pain.

While the pig was gutted and prepared for the barbeque, the boys and I busied ourselves with the more important task of using our head-torches and the long exposure on my camera to draw willies with light; and write words.

Writing With Light

Writing With Light

The meat was delicious, prepared in a moreish marinade and barbecued to perfection. The skin was a little stubbly, but that only added to the experience of munching on a recently slaughtered pig, on a beach, next to the River of Gold, in the Nepali wilderness. Blissful.

Which is a word I can use to describe the whole trip. Every aspect, from gracefully floating along to crashing through erratic eight-foot waves; from lying under the stars in front of a blazing camp-fire to fending off a pack of wild dogs; from playing Platesbee in the sand to eating recently slaughtered BBQ Pork; all of it was truly and completely blissful. Perhaps it was the lack of concern or even thought for the outside world – we speculated that we were unlikely to even be aware of nuclear war; perhaps it was the great company and instant group cohesion – Pradeep told us that we were the best group they’d ever had, as we were straight away like old friends and made their job much easier and more enjoyable; perhaps it was the natural beauty and balance between the serenity of the hills and the ancient power of the river – almost unaltered by human influence. I think it was all of them and more, but you’ll have to try it yourself to find out.


Oh, OK. I won’t just pass by, nonchalantly dropping the phrase “crashing through erratic eight-foot waves” without exposition. I will tell you about Class III-IV rapids – if you didn’t see it earlier, here are the Definitions of Rapid Classes. By my reckoning, the main difference between Class III and IV rapids is fear. Class III rapids are four- to eight-foot waves that, paddling hard, you crash through or over, depending on your timing. They are fun, exciting and something like a roller coaster that, if you don’t hold on with your toes, you might fall out of. Class IV rapids are somewhat similar, except that your paddling seems to have no effect at all and you begin to remember how the dragon Sun Kosi lies in wait. Still fun and exciting, but fun and exciting because you’re probably going to get a lungful of ‘buffalo soup’ – what we called the river water due to the propensity of water buffalo to conveniently die and rot at the water’s edge – and not have a raft to sit on any more.

To illustrate this further, on our last day we were so blasé about Class III that we continued our game of I Spy DURING our combat with a sequence of large waves, which we deftly surmounted to the cries of


Coming Soon

After a despicable delay, this weekend will bring some new chapters of the MojoQuest. Having floated down one of the ten best river expeditions in the world, stayed at the Four Seasons Hotel in Hong Kong and defied all odds by not getting ill again, these chapters are sure to be of greater than mildly average quality.

If I can find the thumbnail-size USB stick I bought in Nepal, then there may also be some pictures. Don’t get your hopes up though, I think I dropped in a Hong Kong gamers’ café.